Someday, you’ll be on your deathbed. Or you’ll see a semi-truck barreling straight toward you. Or you’ll slip on a glob of shampoo in the shower. And for a few moments — right before you kick that damn bucket, before the semi-truck turns you into a human pancake, before you crack your skull on the edge of the bathtub —  you’ll think, “Fuck. I wish I did that thing that I always put off.”